Integration through Observation

There is a lot of self-development talk around the notion of self love. But many people react to this with resistance, confusion or even fear. “What does that even mean?” they will ask. “I don’t even know what that is!” they lament. You can’t self-medicate with something you can’t identify or define … if you don’t have a sense of ever having been loved well then self-love will of course feel scary. 

When you’re not loved for the one you are; when you are not welcomed to the world nor loved unconditionally, it’s an act of abuse. If you can’t recognise love, or if you’ve been told what you’ve been shown is love when the reality is it hurts like f*ck! then this abuse is mistaken for an act of love. When, added to that, you have been verbally and/or physically abused — when the cues from your primary caregiver in no way meet your needs — the very reliance on love will in fact become a reliance on self harm. In fact many adults add to childhood abuse by self-harming in an attempt to replicate what they were taught was love because of the new age idea that you will only self-develop through self-love.

Don’t force self love. It may never come. Don’t even force self acceptance. Just observe … that’s enough. Don’t try figure it all out. Just be … who you are. And in the observations, see the fragments of your child self that make you smile, that open your heart, that fill you up … and then patch them into your current reality of who you are today. When the pieces come together, as surely they will, the peace will come.

Love may always be an elusive intangible thing so create that which brings you integration.

How do you feel now?
How you would like to feel?
What’s getting in the way of the ideal you?
How you can go about getting through the obstacles you can and accepting the ones you can’t?

The Fabric of the Body

If you imagine the human body as an interwoven web of threads into an intricate fabric, you may be able to get an image of what it would look like if any part of this fabric is twisted or stretched. What you may then understand is that one part effects the whole … and the premise then is that if one aspect of the human body on any plane – physical, emotional, mental, spiritual – is injured, stressed or struggling to find homeostasis, then the whole is impacted and pains may show up in a completely different area.

With Craniosacral Therapy I work with the whole system, tuning into the weft and weave of the intricacies of the human body, mind and psyche. What you present with may not be what I work with and what I work with may not be what you find ultimately resolves in your system. Working with your fabric also has an impact on the fabric of all those in your family and the best part of it is that, even without articulating what we’re working on together, your system will once again find its still point where homeostasis is present.

This is the Circle of Zen

At the beginning of every journey it is easy to seemingly know everything… but it is only when you’re experiencing the territory that you begin to see how much there still is to learn. When you get back to the beginning, the path hasn’t changed because of you but you have changed because of the path. And you still know nothing. Walking the same path over and over again doesn’t make it easier, it simply highlights things you didn’t see before … it is not in the knowing that change happens; it is in the seeing. With the attainment of wisdom comes the ultimate acknowledgment of one’s own ignorance… and thus begins the same cycle.

Find the Pause

‘In between the stimulus and the response there is a space and in that space is our power and our freedom.’ ~ Viktor Frankl

Habits cut us off from ourselves because we tend to use them to escape ourselves so – as with breaking any habitual behaviour – pause as you move towards it and, in that pause, feel into the sensations in your being that give you the cues and clues around whether it’s really what you want to do or whether it’s simply a way to not do what you don’t want to do.

So, I ask you today, can you want whatever it is without judgement and shame and then work with it in your imagination in a way that gives you a sense of deep inner peace?

Can you get to the essence of it to find the love that resides in it … your own presence … the presence that already exists within you. Because you are not a drop in the ocean but the entire ocean in a drop – you contain the entire universe in the atoms of your being so you have the capacity to bring forth exactly what it is you need right now.

Love yourself into healing – commit yourself into healing – trees need the wind to create a hard core … so use these winds of change to create your own solid core of worth, compassion, love and care.

Grief is an invitation to love

We are not human beings on a spiritual journey but spiritual beings on a human journey — mortal in body and mind but not in spirit — inhabiting these vehicles as a tool of ascension, up to that point that we have either completed the current work or our bodies no longer have the capacity to carry us.

And just like we cannot get over anything (transcend) but have to rather get through (ascend), so too do we have to travel the passage of grief.But we are not taught to grieve well. We are instead taught to be polite with our mourning, to be strong, to remember the happy times … whilst that energy that moves through us at the time of loss finds all the spaces and places it can crack wide open, ripping into us until we want to wail and weep and howl and rage.

I am no stranger to loss and grief but a novice at losing a parent. Although inevitable — although even anticipated — it is like the connection of one’s spirit to the spirit of the one that’s leaving has to perforate and separate in order to allow their full departure.

Death pays no heed to manners and the force of grief needs to be freed to move … and shake … and break one’s heart … so wide open that it is impossible not to learn that loss is simply an invitation to love more.

Be Fluid

There are so many ways to explore one’s inner landscapes and outer realities. For me, it’s fluid tumbling and twisting in the primordial amniotic fluid of the psyche where I find that womb-like nurturing and waterlogged madness that take me on a dualistic journey of finding (and often fighting) my way back into my body.

This is by no means a finite journey but rather a continuous adventure of the inner landscapes of my psyche … constantly leaving, searching, learning, practicing and arriving … back to the same place but changed by the journey … 50 years of exploring and knowing myself for the first time.

As the continuation of my birthday celebrations, I was visited after a ballet class by a soul sister bearing a gift of the sweetest-smelling single rose, in full bloom, attached to a pack of Cosmic Dancer oracle cards. And the very first card I drew? Be Fluid.

Water can be yielding and can also wear down the hardest of obstacles. I am reminded to do the same — to be in flow and adapt according to the environment.

With Craniosacral Therapy I access your fluid body, working with the jelly-like cerebrospinal fluid that is encased in layers of dural membranes, continuous from brain through spinal column, and that in turn encases your central nervous system. By working this way, I can access your entire being by touching lightly into the landmarks of your body and, in so doing, bring cohesion to body, mind and soul through attending to the symptoms that are calling out for healing. 

Pay-as-you-can for Craniosacral Therapy for the month of July 2021

Because healing has become both crucial for all as well as financially inaccessible for many, I am going to try out a sliding scale concept in my practice for the month of July.

If you are able to pay more than the R850 session fee, please pay what you can in order to enable access to healing for those who are not able to pay this fee. If you aren’t able to pay the R850 session fee, please still contact me with what you are able to pay as I will not turn anyone away due to lack of funds (for the month of July only for now but hopefully I can extend this if the plan is feasible).

I will also be offering a complimentary session to everyone who books three treatments during July; this fourth session can be used anytime before the end of 2021.

This being human is not a solitary journey so let’s all join together to do our own healing and enable others to do theirs too. 

Please see wellworthbeing.com for more information.

Contact me via the online form or by email wellworthbeing@gmail.com or WhatsApp 0741011621.

Information required:
* Name and number
* Preferred dates and times
* How many sessions you would like to book
* What you are able to pay.

This is a trust system so please exercise discretion when using this payment plan.

I look forward to seeing old clients again and meeting new clients.
I look forward to journeying with you on your healing path.

Nomad

I’m not a healer because that alludes to an end point when we are always in varying states of health and vitality.

Instead, I help you optimise your resources:
🗝 on a physical level with Craniosacral Therapy;
🗝 on an emotional and mental level with coaching,
🗝 and on a spiritual level with guided nature activities and visualisations.


The goal is not to eradicate all dis-ease, discomfort or dysfunction but to find and develop those inherent resources that you can use to cue your sense of ease, comfort and function.

Let me take you on a pilgrimage and map a new territory.

My Work is my Art

Art is not decorative; it’s what causes change.

I don’t hand you your health nor do I provide you with the answers. What I do is hold you in a space of non-judgement, mutual respect, trust and freedom of expression so that you can drop into an integrated state of being — mind, body and heart — and discover that you are already healing and you already have the questions that are guiding you towards the answers … just keep journeying and they will lead you back home to you; to your innate wellness and to your true vitality.

Craniosacral Therapy and coaching are the mediums that I use. What’s your medium that you use as the vehicle of translating your gift into a language your audience can hear?

If you can see your work as your art, what are you creating today; what change are you effecting? 

Method Addiction

I’m not a fan of anything prescriptive. I believe in teaching people how to awaken their innate wisdom rather than touting methods for wellness, healing, training or life goals in general. This is because if we are in tune with the intuitive nature of the body, mind and heart we will spontaneously gravitate towards that which will ultimately benefit us on a deep somatic level.

Thirteen years ago, and for several years beyond, while I was going through the trauma of separation and divorce — and all that entails when egos are frayed and children are hurting — I would take myself to the icy Atlantic and breathe meditatively through the freeze as I gradually submerged myself in its numbness. Once I had calmed my sympathetic nervous system and slowed my heart rate and breath, I would lie back and surrender to the support of the water, relaxing fully into her arms. All the while my calming inner dialogue would remind me that this will pass, that I will be warm again, that nothing is forever and that the Law of Impermanence is my soulmate. I was generally the only person back then … incredulous onlookers considered me mad. But now it’s a method; now it’s en vogue; now everyone, whether or not they are intuitively being called to #icebathing, will force themselves to go there because now you’re considered crazy if you don’t.

Having said all of that, I’m always up for a #challenge! So when I met a friend this evening for a swim in the tidal pool, and he set his watch for 20 minutes, there was zero chance I was going to get out a second before the goal regardless of having lost control of my lower jaw at around the 15 minute mark.

With the sun behind mottled clouds, after 20 minutes in thirteen degree Celsius water, I fumbled over belt and buttons and managed to tap my thumb in just the right place to capture the magnificence of yet another magical Cape Town sunset. And then I had to recruit a driver so my body could shake out all that needed to be released.